Vampire knight memories
by Zerovk
Summary: That girl from his vision , would he ever meet her , would he ever recall , in vivid details , their times together ? A very close-to-original interpretation of vampire knight memories , featuring Ai kuran , kaname kuran and Ren kiryuu .
1. Chapter 1

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Kuran kaname did not know much about himself . He was told , he had to be told what his name was . Ren often took it upon himself to reveal a lot more than was necessary , Ai would always scold him for it , exclaiming ' Ren , stop ! Mother told us not to talk about it ! '

Whenever they spoke to him about the past , he went silent and listened , seemingly teleporting to a whole other world . Everything in his head , life and heart was a jumbled mess , threatening to suffocate him .

Just as he was about to call it a day , turn the lamp off and sleep , someone knocked on the door .

Ever so softly , almost imperceptibly , his eyebrows twitched in curiosity . Did Ai want something ? The former ancestor briefly wondered before turning his head to face the door as he gave permission for the girl , his daughter , to enter .

Much to his surprise , the person stepping inside had not been who he'd expected .

" Ren ? " kaname spoke up softly , gently , no hint of distaste evident in his tone or expression altogether , just a never-ending reserve of serenity .

He had never really been alone with the young boy before , Ai had always been there , filling the void made by both of them . Neither talked much after all .

Besides , Ren had that imperturbable vibe about him , always looking calm and distant despite having a certain warmth , a vague sense of purity and kindness . It often reminded kaname of Angels .

So , to see the same boy looking slightly flustered and awkward about his actions despite having been one to seek the elder out , had not been expected at all .

" I have always wanted to try this ."

Kaname's chocolate brown orbs wandered all the way up , to the pillow and blanket the young boy held in his hands , the sight giving him enough answer without needing to ask what those words implied.

" I have wanted to .. With him.. " the silver haired younger uttered ambiguously . He , however , knew his point would get through without him having to elaborate further .

He was always being careful not to mention his father in front of Ai or within her earshot .. Biological or not , she'd loved him from the bottom of her heart .. He sometimes found himself suspecting the facts because of it . It felt like .. Like it saddened her more .  
Don't get him wrong , He did treasure his father beyond words . And from what he has heard , Zero kiryuu was someone you'd regret not meeting .

As his son , Ren could always feel that dull pang , that ache ,that unsettling emptiness growing inside of him whenever he recalled the fact he never got a chance to see him . He was gone before he could .

His father had been condemned to suffer since birth . His childhood had been tainted , he's seen his parents getting murdered in front of his own eyes and could do nothing about it .. He was ready to give his life for his twin . He had to face the shock of learning it was no coincidence but a scheme plotted by his other half, the person he was ready to die for , Ichiru Kiryuu ..

He had to live with the pain of becoming .. No , being turned , against his will , to the monster he has been raised to hunt . He had to survive , alone, in a world that deemed his existence a mistake , a disgrace , a ticking time bomb , a D .

He had to see the one person he came to love getting snatched away from him .. And when he finally got her back , it had to be so fleeting . He raised the child of someone he once thought of as an enemy , the reason behind all of his misfortune , and yet he was denied the privilege of meeting his own son .

The amount of unjust my father had to suffer never failed to tug at my heart strings , my veins and brain cells . Ren thought with an inconceivable amount of pain plaguing his heart .

And yet I still feel that Ai's feelings for my dad are a whole other story . After all , he'd fathered her and not his own son . She has to live with the fact she's never going to see him again .. our mother too , we'll never see her again .

Nonetheless , I have learned to find consolation in the fact I can't lose something I never had . Perhaps that's why I always felt my love for him lacked in comparison to that of Ai's . she had him and lost him .

" come here , Ren. "' Voice like velvet , The elder urged , outstretching his left hand to the said silverette , snapping the said out of his thoughts .

Just one look at the extended hand , coupled with the gentle expression kuran gave him , was enough for the last shred of strength to come undone . The silver haired young man found himself falling , like silk , to the ground , crestfallen and overwhelmed , until he registered a certain sensation .. the same gentle hand that has once pulled him closer when kuran first woke up , revived as a human . _That was mother's wish , after all ._ A bitter smile found its way to his lips at that .

Kuran Kaname has reached forward , softly brushing his fingers through the younger's delicate silvery strands , a color he knew was not inherited from her , the woman claiming possession of his dreams and memories .

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	2. Chapter 2

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When I woke up , I got the distinct feeling that something or someone was missing , or at least not present where he should be .

I Blinked , once , twice , taking a deep breath before succumbing to a fleeting moment of darkness as I let my eyelids slide shut .

I could hear the birds chirping in the distance , feel the warmth of the sun caressing my face and soothing my heartache .

There is a certain beauty to life when the gift of sight is not present .

I always found it confusing how something as foreboding as darkness can inspire such irreplaceable sense of serenity inside of me , when the blessing of being able to see cannot .

With a feeble smile , I wonder what mother and zero would say if they heard my thoughts , if they could .

Mother would be in tears at how poetic I can get , grieving over how she didn't inherit my other father's intelligence .

I still recall that time I was spying on zero and mother , in cross academy , as they sat on that particular bench , talking about anything but their feelings for each other . It still gets on my nerves .

I started badgering about how I was going to sulk in my bed until they give me a sister . Of course at that time I used to deny Ruka-onee-san's words and claimed i just wanted a sister so I could tame her at a young age , to suck her blood later on .

But in truth , I wanted them to be together , I even stepped aside for their happiness and bid my first love goodbye .

Several years of waiting later , life granted me the exact opposite of my wish , a brother that resembled Zero .

Choosing that moment to open my eyes , I began sitting upright , wearing a smile .

I was often told that I had my mother's smile , one that overflowed with radiance and benevolence .

Back then , when mother and sometimes , seiren or the others told me about my other father , I felt that a part of me was empty . As much as I loved listening to those stories , especially ones told by seiren or mother , and rarely Zero , It couldn't compare to meeting my biological father .

But now that I have him by my side , I can't help but long for everyone else .

Sometimes I wonder if such was the case for Ren . When I teased him back about father , mentioning how he himself has been thinking he disliked him , he said he wasn't sure what he felt . I can understand why he would feel like that . Ren has no reason to like my father . In fact , he has every reason to hate him . But then again , like father like son . Ren is Zero's son after all .The Complex nature of his heart cannot be described in words .

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I still remember the vivid details of what happened that day , when my father sacrificed himself for the sake of putting an end to war .

I remember my mother's tears and screams , her attempts to take his heart back and him stopping her because it was too late for that and it's not like he hadn't any happiness , I remember it all like it's my own .

I remember his words about how mother was his warmth and happiness , someone he vowed to protect , someone he made selfish mistakes for . But those were his own choices and he didn't regret them .

However , he had to atone for his sins .

It shouldn't be happening .  
Even zero thought the same . He voiced it too .

Despite everything , my first love wore a pained expression as my father reached out for him , bringing all three of them close , confessing how he finally understood the radiance he'd been squinting his eyes because of .

 _they should be together_ . he spoke up with conviction and stressed it when he rephrased the words , saying he wanted them to be together .

Contrary to his wish , However , mother didn't know how to properly respond to Zero's feelings . she still felt the pain of losing my father well up inside her , a void stretching in her heart . And it was only because of my existence that she smiled again .

 _It's a great thing that Ai was born_ . I remember Zero saying that to mother . Now that I have grown up , I can't fathom how he could love me , let alone tolerate the very idea of my existence .

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I still remember my first soiree and how I pushed away every man that came with the intention of asking me for a dance . I remember how mother apologized on my behalf before we went back home earlier than expected , the thing that had my other father surprised . it's then that I burst into tears and ran to him throwing my weight on his body . He allowed it . he held me close and gently as I buried my face in his neck and admitted 'even though when it's zero I'm happy to be touched .'

At that time , father Zero wasn't living with us anymore . And when I asked about it , mother said they were both busy and a lot of issues had to be taken care of . As a child , I didn't know what sort of issues but I had a feeling that they were in a relationship frowned upon .

I even found myself thinking that if mother didn't need him anymore , ... Then.. maybe Zero was angry because mother still loved father kaname .

I can never forget it . the night I opened a box I shouldn't have .

For that person sleeping in the coffin , mother was captive to the thought of erasing all purebloods by her hands , thinking that by doing so , he would lose his reason to be a sacrifice .

She spent a considerable amount of time after his loss , sinking deeper and deeper in a world of pain and despair , with the only one pulling her out of the darkness being zero and my existence that was given to her by that person .

Before that , she'd made it her mission to bear the burden of the blame for his sacrifice .

She was merely existing until the day she could revive him and Zero knew that . However and instead of festering the hurt her actions brought about , he told her it was okay to be happy , to think of herself in the meantime .  
He never seemed to mind being second . But it must have hurt .  
He kept waiting for her to move on , while constantly reminding her his feelings would never change .

Never once had I heard a word of resentment coming from him about my other father .

If there was one thing he couldn't forgive father kaname for , it was leaving mother , the woman they both loved , with a senseless burden , for giving her pain .

Words can't fit when it comes to those three .

A particularly loud creak snapped me back to the real world and I soon learned it was the window slamming shut under the force of the wind .

Jeez .. I got lost in thoughts again. I guess it was bound to happen . Those memories and stories I tell to my other father , they linger in my head and leave me not .

Why did I even rewind all of those memories ? What started it ?

Ah .. Right .

Ren and father kaname .

Speaking of which , I wonder if they are awake .

Slipping out of bed , I gather my hair in a ponytail , the action reminding me of the times when mother used to brush it and say I had the same hair as father , before sauntering my way out of the room and to the hallway , destination being the bathroom .

As soon as I finished freshening up , I decided to let my legs lead me and before I knew it , I was standing in front of father Kaname's room .

What astonished me was the fact I could sense Ren inside .

Tilting my head to the side , I briefly furrowed my eyebrows before falling into a relaxed position again and finally , I allowed myself to ease the doorknob open , as furtive as I possibly could.

The sight that greeted my eyes both , warmed me up and broke my heart .

Ren's head was almost touching father's shoulders and I didn't have to pry under the covers to know their arms were linked together as they peacefully slept . My brother and I have this habit of holding arms , it puts us to sleep in no time .

Human contact inspires a feeling of being safe and sound . I always felt like it was deeply ingrained in me , wanting to look after Ren and protect him even , or perhaps especially , in sleep .

But now I guess there's one more person who can provide him such warmth and security . And it makes me the happiest . I can never make it up for my brother , no matter how much I try . I just know it .

Not an ounce in me registers jealousy at the sight of my own father sleeping next to him . Not the even the thought of them getting closer manages to disturb me . Instead , I feel something I have never quite felt before , a strange sense of joy and contentment overwhelming me .

I'm sure that mother would have started shedding tears if she could see what I see right now .

Father kaname has no memories and consequently , no reason to hold a grudge against Ren . I still believe that even if he had them , he wouldn't be treating him different , because a part of Ren came from mother after all ..

Nonetheless , I can't imagine him mistreating my brother even if Ren had no ties with mother . Someone who was ready to think it was always his fault and that if he'd been more careful , seiren and her twin would have escaped and survived , can never be heartless enough to do that .

I admit that father Kaname has had his fair share of sins committed and aggression harbored towards innocents , but it was done for the greater good .

He may have made tragic choices that completely changed people's lives , ruined them actually , but his intentions were not ill , just his methods were .

I cannot justify his actions .. But ..sometimes , sacrifices has to be made , regardless of the time or the suffering it would cause , the people it would affect .

There was just no helping it .

I finally understand it now .  
Mother wanted him to be free

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She wanted him free of power , boundaries , responsibilities and expectations forced on him because of his position as a pureblood . He's never had a chance to rest in peace . His life was made up of either losses or sacrifices and a very tiny amount of happiness .

 _I want to give to you, whom I love , the world that I saw when I was a human._

those words still resound within my head with painful clarity .

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	3. Chapter 3

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Chopping sounds echo in the kitchen where a certain female pureblood finds her throat tightening and vision blurring .

She stops , lifts her head and wills the tears away , lips pursed as she squeezes her eyes shut , allowing the first drops of grief a chance to roll past her cheeks .

She'd wanted to prepare breakfast . It was usually Ren doing so but when she saw him sleeping with father kaname , a peaceful expression adorning his face , she didn't have it in her to wake any of them up .

She'd forgotten though , too occupied by her infinite consideration for Ren , that cooking , alone , with no one to distract her , meant she'd inevitably drown in memories of her late father .

She could never forget the way she used to climb to the counter as Zero prepared them food , under the guise of wanting to learn a certain recipe but secretly just to spend some time with him .

It's not the first time she staggers at the threshold of breaking down recalling that .

Ever since .. the day he was no more .. It had been happening to her a lot , even before mother gave birth to Ren .

The house has since felt too huge for them . Zero's death had left a deep unyielding void that no one else could fill no matter how much they tried .

The moment she found out , Ai could only stare blankly , in denial , disbelief and a thousand different emotion , all full of anguish and despair .

She'd always known that the one leaving first between her parents would be him . But that hardly made it hurt any less .

It was too sudden . They'd just made their relationship official ! They were supposed to be happy at long fucking last ! Why did he have to die ? Why ? Before he got to meet his son , Ai's brother .

Why .. why was life so cruel ? So unfair ?

Ai didn't understand then and still couldn't after all of those years .

Her mother might have seemed to fare well , but she wasn't .

 _Zero's loss , along with my other father , were too much for her to tolerate ._

Even before that day came , she would spend every moment captive to the clutches of shock whenever she heard the word 'dust' . It reminded her of the day he would be gone and that she feared more than anything else .

She'd gone through the same trauma when Ruka and Akatsuki exchanged the vows in their wedding .

 _Until the day we become dust ._

The only reason Ai knew that much was because Yuki herself had told her , about a day or two after Zero's departure .

He may have not been her biological father , but he did father her in every meaning the word held . And with him gone , she truly had noone to turn to , aside from her mother .

It's in those times that she found herself missing father Kaname more than any other time .

How could life take both fathers away from her ?

Wasn't one of them enough ?

Never mind her .. what about Ren ?

Who would father him ?

On what grounds did he have to suffer such fate ?

And then .. in the blinking of an eye , she had to lose her mother too …

That was the only way she could meet her real father .

" .. Ai . "

Her breath caught as she heard that tone she just recently got accustomed to .

Swirling around , her moistened eyes landed on him leaning against the doorframe , looking at her with an expression she couldn't quite put a name to , for it was confusing .

What seemed like a smile but was not.

What seemed like sadness but was not.

What seemed like tender concern .. and was .

Any other time , she might have wondered which face was a mask and which was not . but at the moment she could only raise her palms upwards , as if not knowing what to do with them , as if he'd asked her if something was wrong and she didn't know how to answer so she could just shrug .

He didn't ask her , not verbally . But his eyes did .

And she couldn't tell him why he had to see her quivering in the middle of the kitchen with tears painting an angry trace down her cheeks .

He took a step forward and before she had a chance to register anything , he took her in his embrace , the thing that made her eyes widen and heart freeze until the flood came back , with vengeance .

His embrace screamed of heartache and to Ai , it felt like he'd woven an apology through the fine lines of that simple gesture , like he blamed himself and she knew he did . _some things never change ._

Even if it was a given , even if he already knew , she couldn't tell him she missed her other father despite the fact she finally had a chance to meet her actual one . That would be caustic to his feelings .

She couldn't tell him she missed mother either , because that would be blaming him for her mother's sacrifice .

She couldn't say anything . And there was no need for her to . Because the next thing she knew was Ren stepping inside the kitchen and staying still for a moment before giving her a chance to escape .

" Onee-chan . "

It's then that she sniffed and pulled away , avoiding both of their eyes before taking the hint and leaving , heading to the restroom . She did need some time alone to calm down and wash her face .

Ren waited for a moment , before passing by the elder and wasting no time holding the knife , continuing where his sister left .

" She misses my father . "

The word leave his mouth randomly , as if he hadn't spared a second to think of them , and he finds himself surprised , slightly , by the cutting edge of his tone . His words were rough and cold , meant to hurt . Unlike Ai , he was not obligated to choose his words so as not to hurt the former pureblood .

He may have never met his uncle but he did take after him in that sense .

Unfortunately , as much as he did inherit his father's caring personality , he did derive a vindictive streak from uncle Ichiru .

Just because he wanted to try sleeping near a father figure didn't mean he completely appreciated the former ancestor's presence .

His actions at the moment were reminiscent of a panic-stricken teenage girl who just realized she spent the whole night drunk , with a playboy , and was now faced with the dilemma of the possibility she might be pregnant at worst , and at best , might have lost her virginity .

He didn't want to acknowledge what he did the night before . How could he have been so vulnerable and lost in front of Kuran ?

Ren was too focused on those thoughts that it took him off guard when he heard Kuran say , in an undoubtedly sincere tone

" He must be someone worth missing . "

The person responsible for Ai growing up into the precious girl she is now must be someone worth missing .

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1298 words

updated 26 oct , 2017

Thank you all for reviewing .

To sakura and Legend , I do mind changing this into Yaoi even though that's what I write . This story in particular has a certain vibe that I'm planning to keep . But I may give your suggestions a try in another fic . The idea of zero with Ai , Ren and Kaname is tempting to write about , but at the moment , I can't afford to get invested in yet another story .

In any case , I do hope you enjoy this nonetheless .

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	4. Chapter 4

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As the gentle breeze serenaded and flowed like a ballerina dancer , Ren dipped a teaspoon in the home-made flower petals jam and started absentmindedly spreading it on his toast , not exactly sure what had him spacing out . It seemed like a lot of thoughts were , so much he lost focus of what exactly occupied his mind .

As usual , they had breakfast in the porch that kaname came to admire . the white railing , the dark brown polymer boards , the potted plants , the simple and elegant outdoor set painted in black and decorated with beige cushions .

" Thanks for the meal , Ren." Expression peaceful , the former ancestor spoke up in a soft tone after savoring the final sip of his earl grey tea . Even though he'd become a human , the royally superior vibe never really left him . His voice reminded Ren of the ocean . so beautiful . so gentle , enchanting , and hypnotizing . And yet so mysterious and ruthless , reciting poems of darkness and promises of harm , destruction , death even .

No matter how much it was obvious the eldest kuran had no memories , it was understandably difficult not to feel intimidated and unsettled by his mere presence .

It never seemed to affect Ai . But the same could not be said for Ren .

He was still wary of Kuran . And despite being a calm person in general , never speaking unless absolutely necessary , the silver haired teen found himself increasingly hostile as of late , never wasting a chance to twist the conversation and lead it back to the same person , his father .

" Don't you think it's funny ? " The question barely leaves his mouth before a lopsided smile shapes itself on his face . He's still gazing at the food with so much interest , misery planted on his face as he pauses for a moment , building kuran's curiosity before adding " I have never seen my father and yet I'm just as gifted as he was when it comes to cooking . "

To Ren's left , Ai keeps on eating , as if she hadn't heard a thing or felt the atmosphere growing tense . She might have been too distracted to notice , attention caught by her thoughts .

She might have chosen to ignore that tension on purpose , under the impression it was better to let those two work things out between them . What good would come out of her interfering every time Ren gave a hurtful remark ?

Besides , she couldn't deny that a part of her wanted to see how father Kaname would react to that . As much as he reminded her of a fragile rose , she had immense confidence he would not break under such circumstances .

They had no way of predicting what his next words would be , despite the countless stories they heard about him .

" Not funny , rather bittersweet . "

 _It must be a source of pride , joy , and relief . But at the same time it would always serve as a painful reminder of your loss_ .

Ren slowly lifted his gaze to inspect the elder male , eyes laden in different emotions as he analyzed those words and drowned in those expressive reddish brown orbs . He hadn't expected such response , in all honesty . He himself had no idea what his reaction would be if he were Kuran .

It seemed as if .. As if the elder could relate . As if he meant to project empathy . he gave it much thought and imagined how he would feel if he were Ren .

The silverette fell silent at that while Ai stilled for a moment before blinking and feeling the corners of her lips shape into a small endearing smile . _She didn't have to get involved after all_ .

 _Father kaname , you truly are a paradox_ .

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 **Nighttime : The Woods :**

An old lady stops in her tracks when she sees a human standing near the cliff .

" this is not a place where a human should wander about at night . " She tries to advise him , stepping closer , just in case .

" Before you accidentally trip , please leave . " She speaks up once more , only to feel stunned as he turns around and faces her .

Eyes widening , she gets even closer , wondering " oh .. could it be . "

But before she could say anything else , a figure appears behind her and warns " Vampire grandma , please don't get close to that person . "

She gasps and stands still .

The stern voice comes back " Please , state your motives or else-

" Eh ? I don't have- "

A feminine voice interrupts the old woman's words .

" Ren , release that Lady . I feel she bears no malice . " Ai emerges , her head tilted to the side , dark locks falling softly to frame her face as she addresses her brother .

Ren takes a step back and does as told , expression blank .

" A member of my family was very rude , I apologize . Please forget about today . " Now directing her gaze and words at the said woman , Ai speaks up again , with a formal expression .

" Ah .. you are .. " The woman doesn't seem to take the hint and Ai finds himself forced to command the old lady to forget . She places her hand on the woman's head and says " forget it . And please , don't enter this land again . "

The old lady's eyes glaze over and she obeys almost instantly " yes madam , I understand . "

She then leaves , never to return .

Once the three of them are alone , ai turns around to face her father and glares at him halfheartedly before pointing her fingers at him and announcing " We'll protect you no matter what so it's okay to go n a walk at night , if you want to . But , you just want to wander around because you have no memories , right ? you think it's only been three hours and then you stand still for 30 minutes . Geez . "

She and Ren have been hiding in the bushes , keeping a close watch over the former ancestor , sweat dropping as he wandered and wandered .. and wandered . .

Father kaname looks taken aback by Ai's comical outburst , even his own face looks hilarious at the moment but it quickly smoothes back to normal and he smiles beautifully before justifying " I didn't think I was doing something bad . "

Ai feels her breath catching and cheeks warming at that . something about the way he smiles makes him even more precious , she thinks .

Once more , It's with a smile that he concludes

" It seems like I worried you . "

The kuran siblings watch as kaname lifts his gaze to the sky and says in admiration " the grass and the ground's scent . the cold night breeze stroking my cheeks . And the specks of light , that have spread out , to form a tent that shines through the canopy of trees .. Taking in this feeling of the breath of the stars , maybe it's been the first time in my whole life . I don't remember . But , it's probably like that , right ? "

Ai and Ren gaze at him ruefully , sympathy written all over their features . But he's not looking at them to see it .

When he does , the first thing he notices is the wound on the silverette's left cheek .

" Your cheek is bleeding , Ren . " He points out , clearly blaming himself for it . Somehow , his face paints a picture of lament , shy gentleness and cold detachment .

" Ah . it's okay . I must have failed to avoid a branch . The wound is already healed . " Ren says , already wiping the blood away with his hand .

Kaname seems to hesitate for a moment before he apologizes " It being my fault , I'm really sorry . "

" No need . " Ren insists calmly , averting his eyes elsewhere , away from Kuran's heart-wrenching ones .

Ai smiles and chooses that moment to speak " Let's go back home . Tomorrow , please come with us to the town over there . "

Both siblings start walking , only to stop dead in their tracks when they hear Kaname say " A vampire's regenerative power . "

Ren is mildly surprised by that , waiting for the elder to elaborate , and Ai mirrors him .

Nothing could have prepared them for the anguished despair taking over kaname's features as he clutches his chest and asks " If we pull out the woman inside me , would she regenerate , I wonder ? "

Ai and Ren stare at him unblinkingly , expressions serious but calm and in way , unreadable .

" Wanna test it out ? " She asks back in a dark rhetorical tone . And Ren holds her arm in an instant , exclaiming in disbelief " What are you saying sister ?! "

She resembles a doll in his grasp .

 _I don't feel either surprise nor fear from his behavior just now . Nor eeriness or crisis . Nothing . Because I knew_ .

Kaname smiles .

He smiles and takes his words back " I will abstain from it . I have a feeling she would be very angry . "

He walks past them , his coat floating , following after him .

" I will try to abstain from stupid behaviors from now on . "

Two pairs of reddish brown eyes are fixated on him as he promises . And Ai finds herself unable to refrain from commenting " I don't think it's stupid at all . "

" Hm ? " father kaname turns his head around at that .

She feels her eyebrows knitting in sadness and tightens her hold on Ren's hand , disagreeing " Calling it a stupid thing . I don't think that at all . "

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" To think that I had to be the one to stop you from attacking that old lady . Who knew you could get overprotective of father kaname . " Ai teased as she leant on the doorframe of her father's room , watching as Ren took a seat in front of the bed , keeping his eyes on the figure slumbering there .

Instead of denying , he chooses to humor her and replies honestly " Can't be helped . Sometimes , I feel like he's the youngest of us - a clueless child or a lost puppy- "

The fact he says those words with such a stoic expression makes Ai stifle a giggle lest she ends up disturbing her father's sleep .

Her fond gaze lands on kaname and stays like that for awhile until she pulls her body from leaning position and instead she takes a step back , ready to leave but not before bidding them goodnight " I can agree with that , Ren . In any case , it's getting late . I will leave father in your care then . Sweet dreams , Ren . Sweet dreams , father . "

Even if he's already asleep , she wanted to include him .

Ren could only shake his head at Ai's actions . But even then , he had a smile on his face .

He could feel how much she wanted them to get along .

He could try to . It didn't seem like an impossible thing to do .

Kuran looked harmless as he slept . Ren couldn't help the sigh escaping his lips as he thought of that .

He closed his eyes , listening to the wind blowing and rustling the trees , and suddenly he found himself thinking of what kuran said earlier .

 _If we pull out the woman inside me , would she regenerate , I wonder ?_

Red-brown eyes flutter open , the owner of which whispering softly " When he died , Mother devoured father . And later on she sacrificed herself to revive you . "

Ren wears a distant expression as he mourns " I wonder if I can safely assume that somewhere deep inside you , my father still lives . "

Oh he was desperate , wanting to latch on any hope that a remnant of his father could still be there , close and within his reach .

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 **Next day : In town** :

Kaname walked next to Ren while Ai ambled ahead of them , returning the greeting of almost every seller in her way .

She came to a stop , however , when a certain woman called her , holding an apple in her hand that she seemed very proud of .

With Ai stopping , they did too .

" This is one of the few lands of co-existence . " Ren explained , staring ahead even when Kuran shifted his gaze to study him . Maybe the elder thought Ren had a split personality or something . And really , he wouldn't blame him . One time he treats him coldly , others he finds himself ready to threaten anyone to ensure Kuran's safety .

Still , the silverette spoke up again , expression betraying nothing as he informed the elder " People have wildly different ideas of what justice is . To accommodate this variety , several regions and territories were reorganized ."

A child carrying a stack of fruit crates staggered next to them . Kuran saw the upper ones teetering , ready to fall . So he caught them and smiled , helping the boy , carrying them and letting the little boy guide him until they deposited the the said crates .

 _I watched the whole thing with rapt attention_ .

 _How could someone so kind possibly commit any evil deeds_?

Ren suddenly found himself recalling what happened the day before . It was childish of him and now he very much felt ashamed of his words back then . He'd deliberately mentioned his father more than once , out of spite , unable to resist the urge of mistreating kuran .

Before anything else could happen , Ai called " You two . Let's go back . I got a discount on the apples . "

And then she smiled in that way that screamed 'I'm kuran yuki's daughter ' .

Kaname watched the old woman who sold Ai the apples smile with his daughter and tell her to visit again .

He turned around and gazed at the joyful vibe everyone radiated .

Only one thing crossed his mind .

 _It's hardly possible this scene came to be without a certain amount of burdens borne and sacrifices made_ .

 _Don't you think I should know about them , yuki_?

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2613 words

updated 29 oct , 2017

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	5. Chapter 5

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It's said that a night of a full moon grants the most desperate of wishes , the sincerest .

Oblivious to the impact of his actions , Ren could not fight his need to slumber and ended up abandoning the chair , in favour of the bed , Kuran's .

The silverette could have slept with his sister or even got himself the futon kuran used to sleep on a few days ago , if he wasn't too sleepy to think straight .

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Ren woke up to a blurred sight of brown that he later on recognised to be Kuran's hair .

He sluggishly blinked once before repeating the same thing and almost succumbing to sleep one more time until his brain started working , linking facts and drawing conclusions .

WHAT ?!

Now jolting to sit up right , the half pureblood could only stare at the elder in astonishment bordering on shock .

What the hell has gotten into him ?

How could he fall asleep next to Kuran again ?! Wasn't one time enough of a disgrace ? Hasn't he already betrayed his father's memory by doing so ?

Not being rude to the former ancestor for Ai's sake was one thing and warming up to him was a total other !

It was not something he planned to do .

He did think of trying to get along with Kuran , just for his sister . But that didn't mean he could disregard what her father had done .

If my father was still alive , I doubt he would have wanted me to welcome Kuran with open arms .

At that point , Ren started contemplating his stay in the house .

Ai had a good reason to be with Kuran . What reason did he , Ren Kiryuu , have to stay under the same roof with his father's sworn enemy ?

The more he analysed the situation , the more wrong it felt .

What the hell was he doing ? Babysitting and protecting Kuran ?

Shaking his head as if it meant doing the same to such thoughts , he reached forward and moved the blanket away from his legs , hating how careful and gentle he did so , not wanting to alert the brunette male .

Why should he care if he woke the elder up or not ?

Quickly leaving the room before his mind decided to give an answer , he made his way towards the bathroom and stepped inside , closing the door and leaning on it .

He squeezed his eyes shut and exhaled deeply , resisting the urge to slam the back of his head on the door .

Maybe he should just pretend Kuran was not there .

It was not going to be easy . it was not going to work .. But it was worth trying , that's what he told himself .

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Ren was peacefully preparing breakfast , holding a pot that he had filled with water and was in the process of putting on the stove when a familiar voice resonated about , startling him so much he jumped and let go , spilling water on the pan of boiling oil .

An angry heat springing to life was the first thing he sensed .

Before he could gasp at the growing fire , however , he felt himself being pulled away so fast that he had troubles comprehending what happened .

A sigh of relief .

" That was close .. " Kuran whispered , nearly out of breath , back facing the danger and thus shielding an immortal from it -when the opposite should have been the case - .

Trapped between the counter and the brunette male , Ren opened his mouth but nothing came out , not right away at least .

" I .. It's okay . It would have healed in no time . " Ren was definitely not one to stutter .. Kuran just had that uncanny ability to make the most unlikely person stumble for words , feel flustered , and start blushing like a total idiot . Their current position was not helping either . Kuran was so fucking close ! Ren had never looked at someone's face that close before , not counting Ai .

The elder smiled at that , the emotions rippling in his gaze worth a lifetime of poetry .

" You shouldn't allow yourself to get hurt just because you have healing abilities . "

Ren could do nothing but feel his fingers on Kuran's arm twitch .

The way those russet eyes so like his own and yet so different .. The way they lingered on his face made him feel as if he'd just said something silly and childish to an elder ..

Kuran's words .. His tone .. His expression .. It was patronising.. in an endearing way , if that made sense .

But someone needed to put the fire out ! Like Ai , for example .

The young girl was in for a surprise when she stepped inside the kitchen and witnessed such sight .

" Who thought it was a good idea to make a fireplace using the pan ? "

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For the rest of the day , Ren made it his mission to avoid a certain human , and eventually , his sister as well .

Ai had a mischievous gleam in her eyes ever since she saw that and Ren just knew what thoughts ran in that sadistic little head of hers .

She rarely possessed a teasing material when it came to him . unfortunately , that has changed .

'For someone who doesn't know what to feel about father , you sure are getting along just fine .'

'You actually have a soft side to someone that's not me ? '

'You were blushing ! I can't believe it !'

' that was rather adorable . Did father tease you because of the fire ?'

' Haha . So even the master of cooking can start a fire in his territory ,of all places . '

Ren shuddered as he imagined the countless remarks Ai would torture him with from now on .

Rolling his eyes , the silverette decided to leave his room for a bit . What he didn't expect to see was Kuran standing in the hallway like he'd just seen a ghost .. He didn't even seem to notice the younger getting out of the room .

Brushing a strand behind his ears , Ren took a step forward and inspected the elder's expression before following his line of sight , finding nothing suspicious there .

What was wrong ?

" Hey . " he whispered , placing a hand on Kuran's arm and getting no response .

Ren felt his eyebrows narrow at that .

without moving his head , he redirected his gaze to the empty hallway , still unable to detect the reason for Kuran's odd behaviour .

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1199 words .

updated 10 dec 2017 .

Experimental chapter . that's a route I have not initially planned for the story to take but well .. let's see.


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